


Hopping Mad

by 567



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-21
Updated: 2017-03-03
Packaged: 2018-08-16 13:28:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8104189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/567/pseuds/567
Summary: Peeta and Katniss work at a nature center with kids and coworkers. Some parts lifted directly from Hunger Games trilogy. Humor, smut.





	1. Chapter 1

_“Peeta!” Katniss writhes and bucks “Peeta!” under him as he thrusts “Pee-!”_

**“Hey, Breadboy!”**

Johanna’s sharp bark shatters Peeta’s daydream just as a projectile hits the back of his head – another acorn. _Grrr!_ _Does she carry those around with her?!_ His glare follows her as she races through the harshly lit workroom grabbing teaching supplies, but she’s saved him from being late, so he holds his tongue.

“Getcher sweet ass up to the meadow, Mellark! I **can’t** believe yer still in here, you **literally** have a fox in yer henhouse **– ha!** Or, are you ceding Brainless’s little chicken ass over to Red?” Her grating cackle fades with her footfall as she hurries down the back hallway to her next group of first graders already assembled in the multi-purpose room.

With a heaving **_GRRR-_ UNT!** Peeta hoists and repositions the unwieldy hawk head onto his broad shoulders, adjusts the beak to better see through the nostrils, then stomps out the heavy double doors of The Hanging Tree Nature Center. Absent-mindedly dragging his magnificent tail behind him, he tromps the fragrant freshly wood-chipped Upper Meadow Trail for the fourth time today, lost in the pleasant thought that after this last group boards the school buses he can stop at Katniss’s place for a long shower before his bakery shift starts. Maybe convince her to join him for a quickie.

Wearing the cumbersome costume while chasing “prey” across a meadow (his prey being enthusiastic first graders in bunny ears and Velcro tails hopping around gathering laminated paper carrots and scurrying to the safety of hoola hoop rabbit holes) was not something he ever imagined himself doing when he landed this coveted paid internship. But this experience fulfills a requirement toward full certification as a Teacher at the Madge D. Undersee Performing and Visual Arts Magnate School. And this opportunity could not be more perfect: he’s done by 3 PM so he can work at his family’s bakery afternoons and weekends; he’s finding inspiration in nature for his art; and, he’s learning a lot of cool science stuff. Best of all, he’s spending more time with his Senior Naturalist girlfriend than he ever has and, let’s face it, probably ever will again because after he earns his degree he’ll either be employed teaching or at the bakery to pay off his loans.

Katniss works long hours at her dream job with District Twelve’s 16,000-acre Lost Miners Reserve shouldering a lot of the Nature Center Director’s responsibilities on account of her supervisor Haymitch Abernathy often being soused. As part of her compensation Katniss lives rent-free in a beautifully restored former hunting lodge intended for teacher workshops and Board meetings. But those public events are infrequent, so for all intents and purposes the entire lodge is all hers including the expansive kitchen that (to both her amusement and her delight) primes Peeta like an aphrodisiac. He even loves cooking for her coworkers for the occasional get-together or holiday party.

But to Peeta’s vast annoyance, one of those coworkers keeps hitting on his girl. She laughs it off, but Katniss is blind to the effect she has on people. And Darius isn’t the only co-worker drawn to Katniss. Just this morning Joanna ogled Katniss as she changed into her rabbit costume and offered to, um, “introduce her” to Harvey 7, Joanna’s newest rabbit vibrator (“Harveys 1-6 died of exhaustion,” she bragged).

Yet it’s Darius’s remarks that truly incense Peeta. Why, only yesterday at lunch Darius offered to “trade” with Katniss – a kiss for every spoonful of her homemade rabbit stew. The lame comments continue today. “Mm mmm, Katniss, in that rabbit costume you look good enough to eat.” Darius is going to need a lucky rabbit’s foot to survive what Peeta plans to do to him. Katniss made Peeta promise to let her handle Darius, but Peeta wants nothing more than to tell the asshole to go _jack rabbit_ himself off. He is only one incident away from ripping Darius’s stuffing out.

Now having trudged to the meadow and taken his position beside fellow predator Darius who is dressed as a red fox, Peeta listens in as Katniss clarifies the rules of the Predator-Prey game to all the excited little rabbits. Everyone’s eager to play…with the exception of “Five-tailed Finnie Jr.” who only recently moved here from District 4 and is still adjusting. The little tadpole’s stealthily pulled off 4 other rabbits’ tails and added them all to his own backside.

Kid’s been a problem all day. While the other students drew food chains, Finnie Jr. broke off the taxidermied opossum’s tail and caused bedlam screaming, _“Eel! It bit me! Swim! Save yourselves!”_ Among those caught up in the stampede was the Center’s receptionist Ms. Effie Trinket who broke a heel running away until Finnie Jr. noisily hit her desktop with the stiff, hairless tail. She found her courage to stop running in her indignation. “That is mahogany!” At snack time Finnie Jr. got tangled up in the puppet theater’s curtain pulley knocking over the entire set. While the team of Naturalists righted the stage and rehung the beautiful new background scenes Peeta had painted, Finnie Jr. ran off with some of the limp hand puppets wailing, _“They’re dead! Dead! They’re all dead!”_ making several kids cry before flushing the squirrel puppet down the toilet because that’s what his dad does when his fish die.

And now he’s taken the other kids’ tails.

Katniss speaks to him with infinite patience. “Finnie Jr., this isn’t flag football. Leave everyone’s tail alone.”

“I’m be like my daddy. He always sayin’ he got alots of tail easy. Wait until I tellim how many I gots!” Finnie Jr. exults.

Katniss freezes for just a half second then blinks and “Peeta!” she cries out as she turns to find him. “Help me get these tails back on so we can start the game.”

Peeta’s shoulders and arms rise slightly before he dramatically slaps his arms down. “How am I supposed to do that, Katniss,” his voice trails off, “I have wings for hands.” He sounds oddly sheepish as though the wings are new prosthetics he’s ashamed to acknowledge.

Upon hearing the mild distress in his voice, she’s instantly uneasy. “Oh. I’m sorry, Peeta.” She calls out harshly, “Darius! A little help.”

Darius struts over then invades her personal space and purrs, “Happy to assist you, Katniss, you yummy little foxy treat.” Katniss’s eyeroll does nothing to dissuade him. “I was thinking, what do you say I “hop” on over to your place after work? We can put these costumes to proper use. Get in some “boinking” before they go back into storage.”

Never having heard of “boinking” – sounds to her like an exercise thing, like “spinning” – and aware that she’s in danger of running out of time before the buses need to be on their way back to school, Katniss ignores his words and orders, “Go join Peeta, Darius.” Undeterred, Darius replies, “Fair warning, I’m catching and eating _you_ this round.”

Katniss smiles wanly, “Focus on the kids, Darius.” That’s the last straw, he can’t talk this way to her and in front of kids. She’ll report him to Haymitch after Peeta goes home at 3.

Turning to the little rabbits, Katniss plows ahead with the activity, “OK everyone, listen up, I’ll explain one more time. Collect as many food items – that’s the laminated carrots – as you can before you get caught by the hawk or the fox, hop into the hoola hoop rabbit holes for safety to avoid being tagged out by our two hungry predators, the game ends when all the food is gone. One to five food items means you survive the winter – yay, you! – but six or more means you get to take home a beautiful coloring sheet of baby bunnies that Peeta drew just for us. _Thaank you, Peeeetaaa._ ”

To Katniss’s delight, the students all sing-song, “ _Thaank you, Peeeetaaa_.” Peeta raises a wing in acknowledgment. Katniss is certain that Peeta is grinning under that beak, and she’s reminded yet again how happy she is to be working with him.

Peeta shifts awkwardly and appears distracted when Darius rejoins him.

Darius keeps his eyes on Katniss. “That Katniss is one tasty looking bunny bite.” He smiles stupidly. “She’s like a fox’s Happy Meal. And I’m one hungry fox.”

“Damn. Oh, shit. The _fuck_?” Peeta looks down to see what’s pulling and realizes that his magnificent tail picked up an impressive quantity of woodchips when he dragged rather than carried it along behind him this last time he hiked to the meadow. He tries to shake and kick his tail free but, ugh, he’s picking up even more debris. Yikes! Now his big-ass talons are crushing down the primroses. He steps back only to stumble into the overgrown shrubbery that Katniss calls “the deer buffet.” Great. Now he’s on the buffet menu because he is seriously trapped. “Arrgh. Grrruh! Rrrrr.”

Katniss speaks to the students in her outdoor voice, “OK everyone, ready to play? Predators will count to five before they give chase to give you a headstart. Bunnies on your mark, get set, GO!” The delighted children spring away, their bunny ears and tails bouncing with every hop….except for Five-tailed, no, just Finnie Jr. He’s not even a One-tailed Finnie Jr. because he’s somehow lost his own tail in the last 20 seconds. _Aaand_ the little tadpole’s crushing dandelions under the toe of his sneaker.

Across the meadow, leering languorously at Katniss, Darius breathes quietly to himself, “Miss Everdeen, I’m going to catch you and eat you all up.”

Peeta missed Darius’s prior utterances, but **_that_** he hears. His head snaps around. His eyes bulge even as his lids narrow and twitch in fury. His jaw drops even as his face and neck muscles clench tightly. And, the rest of his body responds pretty much in a similarly paradoxical way. It’s a wonder he hasn’t turned inside-out under the sheer stress of opposing G-forces being generated by his seizing muscles.

Katniss speaks firmly. “Finnie Jr.”

“Hm?” Finnie Jr. replies softly, still distracted by his experiment of crushing dandelion flowers.

Katniss orders, “Go.”

“Lookit, Kah-niss, my sneaker’s turn-did yelloo,” he says with wonder in his voice, never looking up.

“Please stop. Go get your carrots or you won’t get a coloring sheet,” admonishes Katniss.

With an exuberant shout, Tail-less Finnie Jr. takes off running (and surprisingly in the right direction). Katniss can’t help but smile warmly. Finnie Jr. runs right past some carrots. “Oh, well,” Katniss shakes her head and laughs lightly. He plows into another rabbit kneeling down for a carrot. “Oh, dear!” Katniss watches and listens for any sign of distress. That rabbit is sprawled out, but still clutching the carrot! Yay! Good for – Oh. No. Finnie Jr. steals the carrot right out of that rabbit’s hand. Paw. Whatever. _Now he’s chasing other rabbits and stealing their carrots!_

“Finnie Jr., no!” Katniss pleads as she makes to intercept him.

With furious eyes fixed on Darius, Peeta stands immobilized by the storm raging within his brain. He sees disturbing images of Darius being ripped to shreds and red blood everywhere. He doesn’t know what’s real anymore.

Still talking quietly to himself and sounding creepy, Darius vows, “Yeah, I’ll have her hopping down my furry bunny trail…and “prey-ing” on her knees!” and with that last disgusting pun, Darius sprints off after Katniss.

That. That’s the moment Peeta goes full-on mutt.


	2. Chapter 2

Flushed and shaking, a demented Peeta throws wide his arms only to further ensnare his majestic wings in the tangled mess of branches reaching for him. His roar morphs into a savage rasping scream like a steam whistle— _fscheeeew!_ —quite nearly imitating the fierce cry of a red-tailed hawk! The imitation grabs Katniss’s attention. She’s startled and _extremely_ impressed by Peeta’s dedication (and turned on by his primal full-throated display) when out of nowhere Darius scoops her up bridal style, growls “Gotcha!” and proceeds to make gravelly _num-num-num_ sounds like he’s eating her up while sneaking in a bunch of kisses around her face, neck and shoulders between playful bites.

“Set ‘er down! **_Now_** ,” a fearsome Haymitch growls menacingly wearing a hardened look. “Touch ‘er again, Red, and I’ll see to it that the only job you get in Twelve is in the mines. Now do the job I’m payin’ ya for and get these kids down to the buses. It’s nearly time.” Haymitch turns to study Katniss. She’s livid.

“I need to talk to you. Your office, 3 o’clock,” huffs out Katniss.

Satisfied that she’s OK for now, Haymitch gives her a quick nod then forcefully exhales a loud breath as his shoulders droop. He no longer appears fierce, only pained. “Go check on the Boy, Sweetheart.”

Katniss’s unease grows as she turns to find Peeta struggling and completely twisted up in the overgrown red osier dogwoods. _Ugh, I warned him about the deer buffet. Good thing I had Darius spray that new aerial nest last week before the trackerjacker larvae could pupate and hatch._ As Katniss approaches him, she sees feathers everywhere. “Peeta, you’re molting! Calm down, crazy, I’ll help you.”

"Katniss! Get out of here!" Peeta’s voice is alarmed.

“Woah, woah, Peeta! Hold on!” she implores him.

“Stay back!” warns Peeta, thrashing like a rabid beast and huffing like a train, sweat pouring from him, angry out of his mind from the jealousy raging through his veins like poison. “I don’t want to hurt you.” His eyes are like black pools, the pupils dilated so that the blue irises have all but vanished.

"Peeta?" Katniss is piecing together clues and just beginning to comprehend the situation.

"Leave me," he whispers. "I can't hang on."

"Yes. You can!" I tell him.

Peeta shakes his head. "I'm losing it."

It's a long shot, suicide maybe, but Katniss does the only thing she can think of – reaches into her first aid kit and, as she leans inside his beak and kisses Peeta full on the mouth, gives him an Epinephrine injection to the neck. His whole body starts shuddering, but she keeps her lips pressed to his until she has to come up for air. Her hands slide up his chest to clasp behind his neck. Peeta pants hard as he fights images of Darius and Katniss flashing across his eyes. “Stay with me,” she pleads staring into his eyes. She kisses him to the point of pain. "Stay with me."

His pupils contract to pinpoints, dilate again rapidly, and then return to something resembling normalcy. "Always," he murmurs.


	3. Chapter 3

Her fingertips flit over Peeta’s sweaty scalp and sticky neck as Katniss wracks her brain for everything on care of trackerjacker victims. A strident voice admonishes her to “First check the scene, then check the victim; do not skip over checking the scene in your rush to get to the injured person, or you may become a victim yourself!” _Shit!_ Katniss forces _Fucked up already!_ from her thoughts.

_Was that Prim’s voice or Mother’s? I just realized how similar – Focus! One plum-sized lump, left side neck. OK, could be worse but that stinger may still be pumping venom. Gotta getta look._

Aware that he could throttle her at any moment, Katniss moves cautiously murmuring, “Peeta, let’s get this costume head off. We’ll just slip it over your head real gentle like this. Slowly. Slooowly. Yes, you’re doing so well, it’s better off, good, there we go. Good. Good job, Peeta. We’ll set it down.”

With one hand poised lightly on his chest for balance, her other carefully tips his head away as she lifts onto her toes. She sees it, the barbed stinger with the venom sac and attached pulsing muscles, still pumping venom into the injection site. She reaches for the tweezers in her pack… _Fuck! They’re not there! Fuck! Fuckity fuck fuck!_ OK, not ideal, but she can scrape it out with a fingernail, maybe. _Hold on, Peeta always carries an army knife, and that has a tweezer attachment!_ Peeta startles at the rip of Velcro; quick as a flash, he’s seized her wrist.

“Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, Peeta, let go.” But he doesn’t, he tightens and twists his grip as Katniss sinks to her knees, his hulking mass following her down. “Please, Peeta, you’re hurting me. Please, let go.” She thinks to kiss him again, but his lips are out of reach. The look on his face is nightmarish.

_Nightmare…that’s it!_   Katniss sings soothingly to him.

"When the veil of dreams has lifted

And the fairy tales have all been told,

There's a kiss at the end of the rainbow

More precious than a pot of gold.

Your kiss,

There's a kiss at the end of the rainbow…"

She looks up at him encouragingly, this is the part where he kisses her and sings the last line. Nothing. He’s stone-faced. Katniss struggles against despair. This has to work, she needs this to work. When his face twitches and his expression softens just noticeably, a strangled cry of relief escapes her tight throat. He draws a shuddering breath. _Kiss me, damn it!_ Her heart pounds painfully. Her fear returns. His mouth chews soundlessly. Her stressed brain grasps at straws – _Is he seizing? Is he, is he t-trying to say ‘oil can’?_ – before his voice softly croaks with difficulty:

"More precious than a pot of gold."

Her pursed red lips spur him to ever-so-cautiously close the distance between their faces and just barely brush his lips to hers, eyes wide open.

“Sit, Peeta.” Katniss tries to extract her wrist from his grip but he only relaxes it. “I need the tweezers in your pocket. I’m going to reach inside your costume now and get the tweezers. You’re going to help me. Lay down next to me so I can reach into your pocket. Lay down. That’s it, lay down.”

She wiggles her free hand into the opening. “OK, I’m just putting my hand in your pocket for a minute…” He hisses sharply as if he’s been burned as Katniss gasps – _he’s hard, holy-mother-of-cut-me-a-break!_   His grip on her tightens again. “Ow. Peeta,” she pleads, but he moves his face to hers and her hand to his crotch leaving no doubt as to what he wants. The air still carries the sound of children from down at the bus stop. He sharply tugs her aching wrist. “Ow.”

Taking a steadying breath, she palms his cock. Peeta grunts, maybe the word “good” but who knows, it doesn’t matter, there’s been no miscommunication here. As her hand works him his face takes on a new look and he releases his hold.

She wiggles her tingling fingers then frees him from his shorts. At every touch Peeta gasps and moans. Keeping a hand on him at all times she licks her palms and grips him harder as she pumps him. Her uninjured wrist gives him an alternating twist he seems to be enjoying judging from the erotic sounds he’s making.

Damn, he’s getting her wet. She can’t help but admire his beautiful face, he has the strongest jawline. Remarkably handsome profile. And that mouth of his, that luscious talented mouth, oh the things he’s done to her with that mouth! Giving, that’s her Peeta, he’s a giver. His cock feels so good in her hands, hard and hot and smooth. Slick. She’s getting a hand massage in rubbing his bumpy shaft. The loveliest shade of purple-red she’s ever seen. Her stressed brain forms the errant thought: _Peeta would know the name of that color, Johanna probably has a lipstick in that shade, or sexy lingerie..._

A sparkle of pre-cum reflecting sunlight draws her eye, and she actually flushes with delight in doing this outside. With no more force than a butterfly probing a flower for nectar, the very tip of her tongue flits at the opening, tasting and teasing. Her full lips lovingly kiss the tip and suckle lightly. The flat of her tongue runs around his head eliciting louder throaty sounds that spur her to take him into her mouth. He shouts her name, jerking off the ground before falling back. Without forethought he grabs her head in both hands forcing her to climb over his thigh to settle between his legs. Wisely, she holds his cock at the base with both hands lest she choke. She works him with her tongue, lips and teeth the way she knows he likes, and as she gains control his spasmodic motions become a rhythmic pelvic thrust. Her name escapes his lips with a strained, “Kaat-nisss. Ohh, “Kaat-nisss. Ohh. Pleease.”

Oh, her panties are ruined. Any indignation she felt at his manhandling of her has long evaporated. She’d reverse cowgirl him right now, right here in the open if it weren’t for the furry chastity belt of a costume she was trapped in. Like angry banging on a door the insistent throbbing of her pussy echoes through her as though her pussy’s made a psychic connection to his cock and senses it demanding entry. _I’m in agony. Is this what blue balls feels like? This has to end!_

One hand gently milks his sac – “Katniss!” – applies light pressure to his grundle – “Katniss!” – softly scratches his delicate skin – “Katniss!” And she sucks. “Aruughah!! Uuugh! Uhaaah. Huuh. Huh. Fuuck. Oh, fuuck. Katniss.”

She licks him clean. Though she wasn’t sure at first, she appreciates that he’s manscaped himself smooth. _Gosh, he’s pretty. I gotta get outta this bunny ass of a prison._

**Author's Note:**

> This story is my humble offering of thanks to all the generous writers who have shared their Everlark works. I am in awe of your talent, imagination and dedication. May you find fulfillment in your writing.


End file.
